Part XX

Homer’s (the blind man’s) poetry as seen by helmut s.

“Iliad XIX”



book nineteen


Yet Achilles is still not sure

about the king and wants him to stand up

before the entire army, swearing a binding oath:

he never mounted her in bed, never once

made love with her, never once did the natural thing,

never once like man and woman …

and he wants her back undamaged.

Achilles out of kindness

thinks a lavish feast in the King’s tents

would be appropriate…

and getting his just desert at last.

Yet the King of the Argonauts is happy to answer Achilles,

by sending the best of the young men to get treasures

from the King’s ships, to bring them what their heart desires.




I watched him working on one
of his scenarios, “The what
will happen if
my monthly tips from waiting
fall below $1000,
compared to a constant
monthly outflow, established
by Quicken
over a three year span.”

While Sophia was waiting for
him to swear his solemn oath,
waiting to catch him unfaithful.




After such easy scenario he tried

a more difficult one,

asking himself on the spreadsheet

“How much money may I blow if I

get paid on a book-deal


x-amount of dollars after deducting

expenses accrued over the past

years for the same project and

considering the payoffs to the IRS?”


He knew that the maximum number of

changing cells in a single scenario

may contain up to 32.


He tried it with various reports

available in the Scenario Manager,

and the Summary Report before using the

scenario within a pivot table too.


32 cents on the dollar

ain’t the right answer…






he played considering food: donuts did

he want or bagels and lox

his big toe staring from the hole in his socks

The CD music prettied her up quite a lot

Sophia upped her volume to all she got

Loud was her sound: A-three-thousand


She was a screamer. Yet sanity returned and

being unmovable provided as much participation

as Sirens or Lorelei. Real boom-boxes were

built and intended to irritate more than

one quiet neighborhood. He fine-tuned there-

fore his blaster, much like every pc music fan,

his hand on her mouse, click, clickety clickey,

mouth and ears open like a young boy at his first

visit to Annaheim, Playland, longing to meet Mickey,

His big eyes were filled with insatiable thirst




…happy about all past successes, he was
seeking his luck with the Solver add-in tool.
A beautiful tool which provided optimization
and resource allocation based
upon specified constraints.

At the Goal-Seek command he planned
to save time spent on trial-and-error
analysis. With Goal seeking the value
varied in a cell he specified until a
formula dependent on that cell returned
the result he thought he wanted.

It’s such a beautiful night outside yet he
obsessed with his computer was
passing the time at the little screen
next to the grey box, punching the
letters and numbers
of an innocent looking keyboard,
seeking answers to questions
popping up.





…problems he did not have

was he trying to solve, those

were not what product price or

promotion mix will maximize profits?

But such as how can I live

within a budget, which I don’t have?

And he asked himself just how

many nickels does Nancy

need to feed a machine at the Silver

Legacy while entertaining herself

spinning wheels sipping hot chocolate

without winning a dime and kind

of breaking even? He was happy

for now, he decided on a locked format.

To keep kids, which he didn’t have

and nosy people from ruining

his artfully created database,

he locked all access.

He reasoned to allow only

certain formulas and datas

to be entered was not too much.

He activated the locked format

by selecting cell range > Format

menu > Cells > Protection tab > check

box Locked > OK. And

unlocked it > Tools menu > Protection > Unprotect

sheet > select range I want

to unlock > Format > Cells > select

Protection tab > clear Locked

checkbox > OK. And protected

his sheet again using the Protect

Sheet command. If a user now

attempted to change any locked cell,

the message LOCKED CELLS


such user that he had reached off-limits areas.

His gut feeling however  was

“Too nice a night to go to sleep.”

His brain tried to tell him:

“You must finish your work!

You must-must-must-must!” And he

created a password made up of symbols

and numbers and letters to protect

everything. So it would not get lost…

…he had no problems, none at all.



…and have a most beautiful day, every day!